You can't tell me what to do, Roger Martin. I've got a bucket full of OKRs right here and I'm to masquerade every single one of them as a strategy. Then I'll go on Twitter and tell the world "Boy, you know what's great? Letting OKRs masquerade as strategy."

Then I'll form a Political Action Committee dedicated to making "Let OKRs Masquerade As Strategy Day" a national holiday. Federal workers will be given the day off so they can spend time with their families and teach their children why they should let OKRs masquerade as strategy.

"But dad," they'll protest. "All the kids at school told me Roger Martin says we should stop letting OKRs masquerade as strategy."

"My beloved daughter Isabella," the federal worker will reply, "Roger Martin does not appreciate the value in letting OKRs masquerade as strategy. For this we should not hate the man, but pity him, my child, for letting OKRs masquerade as strategy is what makes this country great."

"Yes father, I understand. I'm so glad Aaron petitioned the President to make Let OKRs Masquerade As Strategy Day a national holiday so we could have this conversation. Just...one last question, beloved father."

"Yes, Isabella?"

"What's an OKR?"

"Haven't a fucking clue."