This is an excellent writeup, both informative and compelling, but as someone who's struggled with depression his whole life, I approach this from a different perspective, one that's less passive and more proactive:
It doesn't matter what the science says. I have to learn from my pain because I have no other choice.
There are many, many ways the human brain copes with tragedy, but ultimately, everything boils down to one simple choice: Let it break you, or let it teach you.
That's it. No matter what path you take, this is your final destination. And in a utilitarian sense, it's a very easy choice, because there is zero benefit to choosing "just sit there and let it hurt you." Once that's the narrative, you've lost the battle.
That doesn't mean you're not allowed to be human, to feel pain, to feel weakened, to feel overwhelmed and helpless and to make stupid mistakes. That's not the problem. It's okay to fuck up and it's okay to hurt.
What isn't okay is letting it win.
Fuck the science. Deep down, you know what to do. Never forget that.